To handle what I’m feeling brings on a cold feeling in the back of my throat and slight headache. I want to have a child. I want to shepherd in the consciousness of a new human that I have given my body for. I want to give my body to someone. I want to give way to biology and the complexity of the forces within, rather than live in delusion that I could, in my limited imagination, provide myself with something greater to do in this life. Is it greater ego centrism to challenge your body to the maximum capacity, or to imagine that I could do something greater, more worthwhile that I thought of myself? I wouldn’t dare to be so arrogant. I want to truly live for someone else, while knowing my ownness in this life...